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Our 2000+ Message Catalog!

For Adhesive & Magnetic
Bumper Stickers, Decals,
Clings & Vinyl Lettering

It's the wildest, wackiest collection on the Web! Over 2000 "Classic & Current" messages, from silly to serious, from crude to classy, from raunchy to refined... They're all here! Search by category, or enter keywords into the search box below. And if you don't like these, just type in your own custom message!

Simply use your mouse to "Copy & Paste" the text of any message into our Design Center. If a message is too long, break it up using more than one line of text. You can then customize it any way you like. Your design can have up to 6 lines, using 90 font, 96 Text Icon, 20 color, & over 14,000 Edge Image choices!


Just Silly (207 Listings)

3 Kinds Of People: Those Who Can Count & Those Who Can't

A Day Without Sunshine Is Like... Night!

A Flashlight Is A Case For Holding Dead Batteries

A Flying Saucer Results When A Nudist Spills His Coffee

According To My Calculations, The Problem Doesn't Exist

Adult Child Of Alien Invaders

Alcohol And Calculus Don't Mix - Never Drink And Derive

All Generalizations Are False

All Things Being Equal, Fat People Use More Soap

All Those Who Believe In Psychokinesis Raise My Hand

Always Remember You're Unique, Just Like Everyone Else

Am I Ambivalent? Well, Yes And No

Amateur Gynecologist

And Whose Cruel Idea Was It For The Word Lisp To Have A S In It?

Are We Having Fun Yet?

Baby I'm Bored

Bad Cop - No Donut

Be Kind To Animals - Hug A Hockey Player

Beam Me Up Scotty, There Are No Virgins Left

Beam Me Up Scotty, There's No Intelligent Life Down Here

Beam Me Up Scotty, This Planet Sucks!

Beam Me Up, Scotty!

Before They Invented Drawing Boards, What Did They Go Back To?

Boycott Shampoo! Demand The Real Poo!

Bumper Sticker!

Can Fat People Go Skinny-Dipping?

Can Vegetarians Eat Animal Crackers?

Can You Be A Closet Claustrophobic?

Caution: Attack Cat On Duty!

Celebrate Perversity

Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult

Clones Are People Two

Clothes Make The Man. Naked People Have Little Or No Influence On Society

Come Out, Come Out Wherever You Are

Copywight 1999 Elmer Fudd. All Wights Wesewved

Corduroy Pillows Make Headlines!

Dare To Keep Cops Off Donuts!

Deja Moo: The Feeling That You've Heard This Bullshit Before

Demons Are A Ghouls Best Friend

Department Of Redundancy Department

Disinformation Is Not As Good As Datinformation

Do Cemetery Workers Prefer The Graveyard Shift?

Do Hungry Crows Have Ravenous Appetites?

Do Infants Enjoy Infancy As Much As Adults Enjoy Adultery?

Do Pediatricians Play Miniature Golf On Wednesdays?

Does Fuzzy Logic Tickle?

Does The Name Pavlov Ring A Bell?

Does Your Train Of Thought Have A Caboose?

Don't Blame Me, I'm From Mars

Don't Forget Winona...

Don't Squat With Your Spurs On

Don't Use A Big Word Where A Diminutive One Will Suffice

Eagles May Soar, But Weasels Don't Get Sucked Into Jet Engines

Energizer Bunny Arrested, Charged With Battery

Even Though This Is A Stupid Sticker, You're Squinting To Read It

Ever Stop To Think, And Forget To Start Again?

Everybody Repeat After Me: We Are All Individuals

First Things First, But Not Necessarily In That Order

For People Who Like Peace And Quiet: A Phoneless Cord

Give Me Ambiguity Or Give Me Something Else

Gravity: It's Not Just A Good Idea, It's The Law

Guns Don't Kill People, Postal Workers Do

He Who Laughs Last Thinks Slowest

Headline: Bear Takes Over Disneyland In Pooh D'etat!

Help Stamp Out And Eradicate Superfluous Redundancy

Help Wanted: Telepath - You Know Where To Apply

Honk If You Love Peace And Quiet

How Do I Set A Laser Printer To Stun?

How Do They Get The Deer To Cross At That Yellow Road Sign?

How Do You Tell When You Run Out Of Invisible Ink?

I Always Wanted To Be A Procrastinator, But I Never Got Around To It

I Am Having An Out Of Money Experience

I Don't Have A Solution But I Admire The Problem

I Don't Know Jack Shit, But I Met Diddly Squat

I Don't Mind Going Nowhere As Long As It's An Interesting Path

I Loathe People Who Keep Dogs. They Are Cowards Who Haven't Got The Guts To Bite People Themselves.

I Plan To Be Spontaneous Tomorrow

I Poured Spot Remover On My Dog And Now He's Gone

I Smile Because I Have Absolutely No Idea What's Going On

I Think You Left The Stove On

I Tried Sniffing Coke Once, But The Ice Cubes Got Stuck In My Nose

I Used To Think I Was Indecisive, But Now I'm Not Sure

I Was Seduced By The Chocolate Side Of The Force

I Wonder How Much Deeper The Ocean Would Be Without Sponges

I Won't Rise To The Occasion, But I'll Slide Over To It

I'd Kill For A Nobel Peace Prize

If A Book About Failures Doesn't Sell, Is It A Success?

If A Mute Swears, Does His Mother Wash His Hands With Soap?

If A Parsley Farmer Is Sued, Can They Garnish His Wages?

If A Stealth Bomber Crashes In A Forest, Will It Make A Sound?

If A Turtle Doesn't Have A Shell, Is He Homeless Or Naked?

If All The World Is A Stage, Where Is The Audience Sitting?

If At First You Do Succeed, Try Not To Look Astonished!

If At First You Don't Succeed, Blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling

If At First You Don't Succeed, Destroy All Evidence That You Tried

If At First You Don't Succeed, Skydiving Is Not For You

If I Only Have One Life, Let Me Live It As A Blonde

If Ignorance Is Bliss, You Must Be Orgasmic

If Marriage Were Outlawed, Only Outlaws Would Have In-Laws

If One Synchronized Swimmer Drowns, Do The Rest Have To Drown Too?

If Someone With Multiple Personalities Threatens To Kill Himself, Is It Considered A Hostage Situation?

If Stupidity Got Us Into This Mess, Then Why Can't It Get Us Out?

If The #2 Pencil Is The Most Popular, Why Is It Still #2?

If The Cops Arrest A Mime, Do They Tell Him He Has The Right To Remain Silent?

If The Funeral Procession Is At Night, Do Folks Drive With Their Lights Off?

If The Police Arrest A Mute, Do They Tell Him He Has The Right To Remain Silent?

If You Ate Pasta And Antipasta, Would You Still Be Hungry?

If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over [Put This Upside Down!]

If You Lived In Your Car, You'd Be Home By Now

If You Try To Fail, And Succeed, Which Have You Done?

If You're Cross-Eyed And Have Dyslexia, Can You Read All Right?

If You're Gonna Be A Turd, Go Lay In The Yard

I'm A Few Beers Short Of A Six-Pack

I'm A Few Clowns Short Of A Circus

I'm A Few Feathers Short Of A Whole Duck

I'm A Few Fries Short Of A Happy Meal

I'm A Few Peas Short Of A Casserole

I'm An Experiment In Artificial Stupidity

I'm As Confused As A Baby In A Topless Bar

I'm From Minnesota, Where We Have All Four Seasons... Winter, Winter, Winter, And Aug 15

I'm Hung Like Einstein And Smart As A Horse

I'm Missing A Few Buttons On My Remote Control

I'm Not A Complete Idiot - Some Parts Are Missing

I'm One Fruit Loop Shy Of A Full Bowl

I'm One Taco Short Of A Combination Plate

I'm Pro Lifejacket And I Boat

I'm Tired Of All This Nonsense About Beauty Being Only Skin Deep. That's Deep Enough. What Do You Want, An Adorable Pancreas?

In Just Two Days, Tomorrow Will Be Yesterday

Indecision Is The Key To Flexibility

Is It Possible To Be Totally Partial?

Is There Another Word For Synonym?

It May Be That Your Sole Purpose In Life Is Simply To Serve As A Warning To Others

It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time

It Takes A Viking To Raze A Village!

It's Called Tourist Season. So Why Can't We Shoot 'Em?

It's Sick The Way You People Keep Having Sex Without Me

I've Found Jesus. He Was Behind The Sofa The Whole Time

Jesus Died For My Sins And All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt

Laugh At Your Problems... Everyone Else Does!

Laughing Stock: Cattle With A Good Sense Of Humor

Look Out For #1 And Don't Step In #2

Madness Takes Its Toll. Please Have Exact Change

Montana: At Least Our Cows Are Sane!

More Hay, Trigger? No Thanks, Roy, I'm Stuffed!

My Antenna Doesn't Pick Up All The Channels

My Elevator Doesn't Go All The Way To The Top Floor

My Inferiority Complex Is Not As Good As Yours

My IQ Test Came Back Negative

No Man Is An Island... Except Manhattan, Of Course!

No Matter Where You Go, There You Are

Nothing Is Fool-Proof To A Sufficiently Talented Fool

Nuke A Gay Whale For Christ!

Ok, So What's The Speed Of Dark?

On The Other Hand... You Have Different Fingers

Only One More Shopping Day Left Until Tomorrow

Peel Off Backing And Adhere To Bumper

People Against Nude Chimps

Pick Your Friend's Nose!

Procrastination Is The Art Of Keeping Up With Yesterday

Proofread Carefully To See If You Any Words Out

Resurrection? Been There, Done That!

Runs With Scissors

Save The Whales - Trade 'Em For Valuable Prizes!

Save The Whales! Collect 'Em All!

Shin: A Device For Finding Furniture In The Dark

Support Bacteria - They're The Only Culture Some People Have

Support Your Local Extra-Terrestrial

Support Your Right To Arm Bears

Tell Me To 'Stuff It' - I'm A Taxidermist

The Face Is Familiar But I Can't Quite Remember My Name

The Noblest Of All Dogs Is The Hot Dog; It Feeds The Hand That Bites It

The Universe Is Rearranging Itself To Accommodate Your Vision Of Reality

The Weather Is Here. Wish You Were Beautiful

There Are 3 Kinds Of People: Those Who Can Count & Those Who Can't

There Are Two Rules For Ultimate Success In Life. Never Tell Everything You Know.

This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To Me

Those Who Live By The Sword Get Shot By Those Who Don't

Time Is What Keeps Everything From Happening At Once

To Live Forever, Acquire A Chronic Disease And Take Care Of It

Ufo's Are Real - The Air Force Doesn't Exist

Very Funny, Scotty. Now Beam Down My Clothes

Visualize Grilled Cheese

Visualize Whirled Peas

Wassup?

We Don't Have A Town Drunk, We Take Turns

Wear Short Sleeves! Support Your Right To Bare Arms!

What Happens If You Get Scared Half To Death Twice?

What If The Hokey Pokey Is What It's All About?

What If There Were No Hypothetical Questions?

What Was The Best Thing Before Sliced Bread?

What's Another Word For Thesaurus?

When Companies Ship Styrofoam, What Do They Pack It In?

When The Chips Are Down, The Buffalo Is Empty

When You Open A Bag Of Cotton Balls, Is The Top One Meant To Be Removed?

When Your Memory Goes, You Can Forget It

Which Twin Has The Toni?

Why Did Kamikaze Pilots Wear Helmets?

Why Do Psychics Have To Ask You For Your Name?

Why Do They Lock Gas Station Bathrooms? Are They Afraid Someone Will Clean Them?

Why Do They Put Braille On The Drive-Through Bank Machines?

Why Doesn't Glue Stick To The Inside Of The Bottle?

Why Don't Sheep Shrink When It Rains?

Why Is "Abbreviation" Such A Long Word?

Why Is Bra Singular And Panties Plural?

Yes I Am An Agent Of Satan, But My Duties Are Largely Ceremonial

You Are Depriving Some Poor Village Of Its Idiot

You Have The Right To Remain Silent. Anything You Say Will Be Misquoted, Then Used Against You

BROWSE CATEGORY LISTINGS - OVER 2000 MESSAGES

Alarm Tailgaters
Art & Media
Attitude!
Battle Of The Sexes
Driving
Environmental
Family, Kids & Pets
Generation Gap
Health
I Brake For...
I Love...
I'd Rather...
Just Silly
Love & Sex
Mental Health
My Other Car...
Optimistic
Pessimistic
Philosophical
Political
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Sick & Twisted
Sports & Leisure

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